Emotional Intelligence is “a set of emotional and social skills that influence the way we perceive and express ourselves, develop and maintain social relationships, cope with challenges, and use emotional information in an effective and meaningful way” (“Multi-Heath Systems, EQ Inventory User’s Handbook” (2011). These skills are important for relationship in our everyday life, but also in work. Peter Drucker, in his book, “Management Challenges for the 21^st Century,” states that self- awareness and one’s capacity to build mutually satisfying relationships provide the backbone for strong management.  Emotional Intelligence (EQ) affects us at every turn.

A book I have cited in an earlier blog entry, “The Millionaire Mind” by Thomas Stanley (2001), also underscores the necessity of EQ in supremacy over a common gauge of success, IQ.  As you may remember, his work focused on 733 multi-millionaires throughout the USA.  In addition to ranking IQ only #21 on the top reasons they gave for their own personal success, when doctors and attorneys’ SAT scores were removed from the list, the average SAT score for these milionaires was only 1190. Their grade point averages were 2.92 on a 4.0 scaled. These numbers are above the norm, but not high enough to be admitted to top universities.

I have asked many audiences what qualities they most admire in leaders they have seen and known. Without question, most of these qualities are characteristics that are emotional and social, not intellectual.  GRADES may be a great gauge of IQ (intelligence quotient), but LIFE, RELATIONSHIPS and EFFECTIVENESS IN THE WORKPLACE tend to be the best gauge of EQ (emotional quotient).

Look around you. What qualities do you see in the leaders you most admire? Do you have these qualities? How can you get them?  Since EQ is a skill you can develop, you can actually get better at it.  Most experts believe your IQ will get no higher after the age of 19. Your personality will change little as well.  But, EQ will continue to rise until it peaks, generally between 50 and 60 years of age. Most of you have years ahead of you to develop in the areas that will make the most difference in your present and future relationships, both in and out of the workplace.

In coming blog entries I will take a brief look at 15 EQ qualities characteristic of success.  You can see them on the building blocks here.  Take some time now to predict which areas you think you will need the most help. As we address them, see if you know yourself well and whether or not your predictions were correct.